Comments on: Emotional Abuse in the Workplace http://chinspirations.com/mhsourcepage/emotional-abuse-in-the-workplace One of the Web's Oldest Personal Mental Health Sites [Est. 1998] Wed, 08 Feb 2012 18:49:13 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.3.1 By: Jane Chin, Ph.D. http://chinspirations.com/mhsourcepage/emotional-abuse-in-the-workplace#comment-170991 Jane Chin, Ph.D. Fri, 13 Aug 2010 13:02:11 +0000 http://www.chinspirations.com/mhsourcepage/?p=465#comment-170991 Hi Debbie, I am sorry to hear about what is happening to you. One of the only ways you can change the tide with an emotionally bullying boss is by altering your own emotions (she is not likely to change unless she wants to). I know my buddhist friends may advise transforming these "abused" feelings into thoughts of compassion for the abuser (who knows if she is going through some emotional pain herself elsewhere, or in the past). I don't know if I am enlightened enough for that yet, but I find "feelings of pity" easier to generate. You turn feelings of anger into feelings of pity for that person, as part of your own self-preservation (anger will eat you up alive from the inside). Hi Debbie, I am sorry to hear about what is happening to you. One of the only ways you can change the tide with an emotionally bullying boss is by altering your own emotions (she is not likely to change unless she wants to). I know my buddhist friends may advise transforming these “abused” feelings into thoughts of compassion for the abuser (who knows if she is going through some emotional pain herself elsewhere, or in the past). I don’t know if I am enlightened enough for that yet, but I find “feelings of pity” easier to generate. You turn feelings of anger into feelings of pity for that person, as part of your own self-preservation (anger will eat you up alive from the inside).

]]> By: Debbie http://chinspirations.com/mhsourcepage/emotional-abuse-in-the-workplace#comment-170378 Debbie Mon, 09 Aug 2010 16:40:24 +0000 http://www.chinspirations.com/mhsourcepage/?p=465#comment-170378 Jane, Thanks for this. I am currently dealing with an emotionally bullying boss. My husband was recently diagnosed with cancer and I carry the health insurance hence keeping me tied to this job and she knows it. I feel so trapped and go home every night depressed and in tears. It's comforting to know I'm not alone. Jane,
Thanks for this. I am currently dealing with an emotionally bullying boss. My husband was recently diagnosed with cancer and I carry the health insurance hence keeping me tied to this job and she knows it. I feel so trapped and go home every night depressed and in tears. It’s comforting to know I’m not alone.

]]> By: Paul Lalley http://chinspirations.com/mhsourcepage/emotional-abuse-in-the-workplace#comment-139586 Paul Lalley Fri, 05 Mar 2010 11:59:59 +0000 http://www.chinspirations.com/mhsourcepage/?p=465#comment-139586 Jane, Excellent piece and more than a little frightening. Bully bosses tend to be insecure and lack the emotional intelligence to get the most from employees. The best managers are those who provide project parameters and then let the project manager do the job with on-going consultation. Micro-managing is counter-productive and demoralizing. I live it every day. Thanks for the post. PL Jane,

Excellent piece and more than a little frightening.

Bully bosses tend to be insecure and lack the emotional intelligence to get the most from employees.

The best managers are those who provide project parameters and then let the project manager do the job with on-going consultation.

Micro-managing is counter-productive and demoralizing. I live it every day.

Thanks for the post.
PL

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