<?xml version="1.0" encoding="UTF-8"?><rss version="2.0"
	xmlns:content="http://purl.org/rss/1.0/modules/content/"
	xmlns:dc="http://purl.org/dc/elements/1.1/"
	xmlns:atom="http://www.w3.org/2005/Atom"
	xmlns:sy="http://purl.org/rss/1.0/modules/syndication/"
		>
<channel>
	<title>Comments on: Dealing with Fear of Success</title>
	<atom:link href="http://chinspirations.com/mhsourcepage/dealing-with-fear-of-success/feed" rel="self" type="application/rss+xml" />
	<link>http://chinspirations.com/mhsourcepage/dealing-with-fear-of-success</link>
	<description>One of the Web&#039;s Oldest Personal Mental Health Sites [Est. 1998]</description>
	<lastBuildDate>Wed, 08 Feb 2012 18:49:13 +0000</lastBuildDate>
	<sy:updatePeriod>hourly</sy:updatePeriod>
	<sy:updateFrequency>1</sy:updateFrequency>
	<generator>http://wordpress.org/?v=3.3.1</generator>
	<item>
		<title>By: Jane Chin, Ph.D.</title>
		<link>http://chinspirations.com/mhsourcepage/dealing-with-fear-of-success#comment-175715</link>
		<dc:creator>Jane Chin, Ph.D.</dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Thu, 27 Jan 2011 18:50:29 +0000</pubDate>
		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.chinspirations.com/mhsourcepage/dealing-with-fear-of-success#comment-175715</guid>
		<description>You&#039;re absolutely right - that quote came from Marianne Williamson&#039;s book! I learned about that common mis-attribution since that comment but totally forgot about my above comment.

I had heard someone do the same thing by opening her speech with it, and I wrote her a note afterward telling her that it was actually Williamson who said that in her book, not Mandela.

Wonder why this was so commonly mistaken and credited to Mandela.

That said, Williamson herself did not come up with it: 

&lt;blockquote&gt;Williamson herself is quoted as saying, &quot;As honored as I would be had President Mandela quoted my words, indeed he did not. I have no idea where that story came from, but I am gratified that the paragraph has come to mean so much to so many people.&quot;&lt;/blockquote&gt;

So the original author / source of this quote remains anonymous, perhaps by design.</description>
		<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>You&#8217;re absolutely right &#8211; that quote came from Marianne Williamson&#8217;s book! I learned about that common mis-attribution since that comment but totally forgot about my above comment.</p>
<p>I had heard someone do the same thing by opening her speech with it, and I wrote her a note afterward telling her that it was actually Williamson who said that in her book, not Mandela.</p>
<p>Wonder why this was so commonly mistaken and credited to Mandela.</p>
<p>That said, Williamson herself did not come up with it: </p>
<blockquote><p>Williamson herself is quoted as saying, &#8220;As honored as I would be had President Mandela quoted my words, indeed he did not. I have no idea where that story came from, but I am gratified that the paragraph has come to mean so much to so many people.&#8221;</p></blockquote>
<p>So the original author / source of this quote remains anonymous, perhaps by design.</p>
]]></content:encoded>
	</item>
	<item>
		<title>By: sunshine</title>
		<link>http://chinspirations.com/mhsourcepage/dealing-with-fear-of-success#comment-175714</link>
		<dc:creator>sunshine</dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Thu, 27 Jan 2011 18:41:05 +0000</pubDate>
		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.chinspirations.com/mhsourcepage/dealing-with-fear-of-success#comment-175714</guid>
		<description>Just to give credit where credit is due, the quote is NOT Nelson Mandela, it is Marianne Williamson, from &quot;A Return to Love&quot;.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Marianne_Williamson</description>
		<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Just to give credit where credit is due, the quote is NOT Nelson Mandela, it is Marianne Williamson, from &#8220;A Return to Love&#8221;.<br />
<a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Marianne_Williamson" rel="nofollow">http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Marianne_Williamson</a></p>
]]></content:encoded>
	</item>
	<item>
		<title>By: Zandile</title>
		<link>http://chinspirations.com/mhsourcepage/dealing-with-fear-of-success#comment-147472</link>
		<dc:creator>Zandile</dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Tue, 06 Apr 2010 01:53:35 +0000</pubDate>
		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.chinspirations.com/mhsourcepage/dealing-with-fear-of-success#comment-147472</guid>
		<description>Wow thank you Jane, i had 4gotten that powerful quote by Nelsön Mandela! God bless you, you,re doing an amazing job by healing with your love + light!</description>
		<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Wow thank you Jane, i had 4gotten that powerful quote by Nelsön Mandela! God bless you, you,re doing an amazing job by healing with your love + light!</p>
]]></content:encoded>
	</item>
	<item>
		<title>By: Jane Chin, Ph.D.</title>
		<link>http://chinspirations.com/mhsourcepage/dealing-with-fear-of-success#comment-115526</link>
		<dc:creator>Jane Chin, Ph.D.</dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Sat, 23 May 2009 17:26:29 +0000</pubDate>
		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.chinspirations.com/mhsourcepage/dealing-with-fear-of-success#comment-115526</guid>
		<description>Jenn,

I understand what you describe - that you feel bad if you&#039;re doing better than others or surpassing them.

One question you may want to ask yourself and think about is this: By doing better, are you automatically making someone do worse? (looking good or bad is not the question here)

Or, by doing worse, are you guaranteeing that others naturally do better? (again, looking good or bad is not the question)

The quote you gave came from Nelson Mandela, and it is true. Many of us are afraid of our true potential, because once we reveal it, we have a responsibility to accept ALL that comes with this revelation - the rewards AND the challenges of acting from this light within each us. 

This turns some of us away, because we have the wrong idea that &quot;uh oh, now we must be perfect&quot;. Not so! Being the true person you are, with all the power you have, DOES NOT MEAN YOU DON&#039;T MAKE MISTAKES. We&#039;re human beings with errors in judgment and occasionally lapses in common sense. We will make mistakes, we will fail, we will win, we will do well... these are all part of the natural cycle of life.

It is always the simple truths that are the most difficult to accomplish. 

My secret is this: even when I sometimes don&#039;t believe I &quot;deserve&quot; success, I go for it anyway. Don&#039;t listen to everything your mind tells you, especially when you aren&#039;t sure if the voice you&#039;re listening to truly belongs to you.

Another secret is to succeed for someone else&#039;s benefit. Once I experience this success, I can then see the answer to, &quot;what additional good can I do?&quot; For example, if I didn&#039;t earn a certain amount of $, then I wouldn&#039;t have been able to donate the $ I had been able to donate to a charity that I really believe in, and have been involved with for many years (using art to heal victims of domestic violence). If I was so afraid of success that I held myself back, then I wouldn&#039;t have been able to contribute to this organization and help them put workshops for kids who have nightmares from witnessing their own parent beating up the other parent. By self sabotaging, not only am I not doing myself any favors, but I couldn&#039;t help this charity help kids break a cycle of violence.</description>
		<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Jenn,</p>
<p>I understand what you describe &#8211; that you feel bad if you&#8217;re doing better than others or surpassing them.</p>
<p>One question you may want to ask yourself and think about is this: By doing better, are you automatically making someone do worse? (looking good or bad is not the question here)</p>
<p>Or, by doing worse, are you guaranteeing that others naturally do better? (again, looking good or bad is not the question)</p>
<p>The quote you gave came from Nelson Mandela, and it is true. Many of us are afraid of our true potential, because once we reveal it, we have a responsibility to accept ALL that comes with this revelation &#8211; the rewards AND the challenges of acting from this light within each us. </p>
<p>This turns some of us away, because we have the wrong idea that &#8220;uh oh, now we must be perfect&#8221;. Not so! Being the true person you are, with all the power you have, DOES NOT MEAN YOU DON&#8217;T MAKE MISTAKES. We&#8217;re human beings with errors in judgment and occasionally lapses in common sense. We will make mistakes, we will fail, we will win, we will do well&#8230; these are all part of the natural cycle of life.</p>
<p>It is always the simple truths that are the most difficult to accomplish. </p>
<p>My secret is this: even when I sometimes don&#8217;t believe I &#8220;deserve&#8221; success, I go for it anyway. Don&#8217;t listen to everything your mind tells you, especially when you aren&#8217;t sure if the voice you&#8217;re listening to truly belongs to you.</p>
<p>Another secret is to succeed for someone else&#8217;s benefit. Once I experience this success, I can then see the answer to, &#8220;what additional good can I do?&#8221; For example, if I didn&#8217;t earn a certain amount of $, then I wouldn&#8217;t have been able to donate the $ I had been able to donate to a charity that I really believe in, and have been involved with for many years (using art to heal victims of domestic violence). If I was so afraid of success that I held myself back, then I wouldn&#8217;t have been able to contribute to this organization and help them put workshops for kids who have nightmares from witnessing their own parent beating up the other parent. By self sabotaging, not only am I not doing myself any favors, but I couldn&#8217;t help this charity help kids break a cycle of violence.</p>
]]></content:encoded>
	</item>
	<item>
		<title>By: Jenn</title>
		<link>http://chinspirations.com/mhsourcepage/dealing-with-fear-of-success#comment-114687</link>
		<dc:creator>Jenn</dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Mon, 18 May 2009 21:53:34 +0000</pubDate>
		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.chinspirations.com/mhsourcepage/dealing-with-fear-of-success#comment-114687</guid>
		<description>Thanks for sharing. I&#039;m still dealing with it. I don&#039;t know how to overcome my mind yet. I must get some sort of payoff by having a fear of success. Sometimes I feel bad if I&#039;m better or do better than other ppl or surpass them. If I win something or get the best grade in the class, I feel embarassed and guilty for doing better. It&#039;s pretty messed up that I feel this way and that I let myself sink lower or do worse than others so that I won&#039;t feel guilty. None of it makes any logical sense whatsoever. 

There&#039;s a famous quote: “Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won&#039;t feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It&#039;s not just in some of us; it&#039;s in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.”

This is so true, yet hard for me to accomplish.</description>
		<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Thanks for sharing. I&#8217;m still dealing with it. I don&#8217;t know how to overcome my mind yet. I must get some sort of payoff by having a fear of success. Sometimes I feel bad if I&#8217;m better or do better than other ppl or surpass them. If I win something or get the best grade in the class, I feel embarassed and guilty for doing better. It&#8217;s pretty messed up that I feel this way and that I let myself sink lower or do worse than others so that I won&#8217;t feel guilty. None of it makes any logical sense whatsoever. </p>
<p>There&#8217;s a famous quote: “Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won&#8217;t feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It&#8217;s not just in some of us; it&#8217;s in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.”</p>
<p>This is so true, yet hard for me to accomplish.</p>
]]></content:encoded>
	</item>
	<item>
		<title>By: Jane Chin, Ph.D.</title>
		<link>http://chinspirations.com/mhsourcepage/dealing-with-fear-of-success#comment-66395</link>
		<dc:creator>Jane Chin, Ph.D.</dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Wed, 30 Jan 2008 18:57:27 +0000</pubDate>
		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.chinspirations.com/mhsourcepage/dealing-with-fear-of-success#comment-66395</guid>
		<description>Thank you, Quint! I&#039;m glad you also found useful the approach that works for me :-)</description>
		<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Thank you, Quint! I&#8217;m glad you also found useful the approach that works for me <img src='http://chinspirations.com/mhsourcepage/wp-includes/images/smilies/icon_smile.gif' alt=':-)' class='wp-smiley' /> </p>
]]></content:encoded>
	</item>
	<item>
		<title>By: Quint</title>
		<link>http://chinspirations.com/mhsourcepage/dealing-with-fear-of-success#comment-66311</link>
		<dc:creator>Quint</dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Tue, 29 Jan 2008 14:31:12 +0000</pubDate>
		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.chinspirations.com/mhsourcepage/dealing-with-fear-of-success#comment-66311</guid>
		<description>Thanks for sharing your personal experience with this. It took me a long time to realize that you can&#039;t just suppress those feelings. Much of the current self-help craze doesn&#039;t deal with these more substantive issues, but just gives quick fix methods for plastering over the problem.

Self-sabotage is incredibly common, and can&#039;t be papered over by simply thinking positive and working hard. I have learned that your method - acknowledging, accepting and acting anyway - is very effective in at least taking those initial steps to overcoming these defeating beliefs.</description>
		<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Thanks for sharing your personal experience with this. It took me a long time to realize that you can&#8217;t just suppress those feelings. Much of the current self-help craze doesn&#8217;t deal with these more substantive issues, but just gives quick fix methods for plastering over the problem.</p>
<p>Self-sabotage is incredibly common, and can&#8217;t be papered over by simply thinking positive and working hard. I have learned that your method &#8211; acknowledging, accepting and acting anyway &#8211; is very effective in at least taking those initial steps to overcoming these defeating beliefs.</p>
]]></content:encoded>
	</item>
</channel>
</rss>

